The Mother of All Baby Showers

I can't take credit for the name of the event that I survived / was blessed with this weekend - I heard both my sister Leigh and friend Amy use the term. But I must say, it is quite fitting.

There is no way I could do this event justice by simply describing it, so I'm including several pictures to give you a sense of the excitement, sentiment, and organization that were central to this amazing gathering of women. (click on each picture for an enlargement)





There were planning committee meetings.
There were clipboards. For each guest. For "Baby Shower Bingo", "Guess the Tot", and the like.
There were Debbie's Famous Whoopie Pies. With pink and blue frosting.
There was a book assembled with computer-simulated predictions of what Tot would look like and people's guesses of names, sex, size, and arrival date and time. And some wise words of parenting advice.
There was a scarecrow/mannequin of Nate's sister Kara since she was otherwise engaged in SanFrancisco. She was wearing some killer boots.
There was a Baby Castle. With tiny plastic babies scaling the walls of it, and dozens of diapers packed inside.







I was amused by a story from our friend Sara about her shopping trip with her 5-year-old Brennan as he helped her shop for their gifts. He told her, "I know why they call it a baby shower. Because everyone gives gifts for the baby to take a shower."
"Well, not really" she explained. "I mean, sometimes there are gifts for the baby's bath, but it's more like people shower the mommy with gifts for the baby."
I guess he had quite the puzzled / horrified look on his face at that point.
"You mean," he asked "She stands there naked and you throw things at her?!"

I just love Kid Think. Can't wait to get our own source for these kinds of gems.

Despite the fact that it can, at times, FEEL as though you are naked due to the sheer number of eyes on you, I am happy to report that I remained fully clothed at all times at my baby shower. Even though it looks like I got a bit shortchanged on some denim at the bottom of my maternity jeans - see below. Classic.
Isn't it a rule that the person with eighty eyes on them for 3 hours gets told if there's some kind of fashion faux pas like that going on?? Or at least a designated person to make sure that an oversized gift bag gets strategically placed in front of her calves for the remainder of the shower?!? I also noticed when I got home that evening that I had a huge piece of spinach in my teeth for who knows how long. And a booger on my nose. Okay, okay, I guess it could be worse - it was really just the highwaters. But still. I wouldn't want to get away with looking too classy at my own shower.

On a more serious note, I must share the very touching quote that was at the top of the Baby Castle. If you don't cry after you're reading this, I regret to inform that, in my unprofessional opinion, it appears that you have been born without a heart.

Okay, maybe I'll concede to being a little hormonal these days. But this quote hit me as being so profound, and actually, a positive spin on the woe-is-me mood I was in yesterday as I spent a dangerous 2 hours in the car, alone with my hormones and music. The overriding theme that continued my crying jag, to and from work, was that "My life as I know it will soon be over."

This life-as-a-non-parent. With only myself to answer to. And be responsible for.

It's been a good life.
With freedom, flexibility, control, late nights out, late mornings in, restaurant meals, cross-country road trips, crafting marathons, and theme parties. Our biggest problem on a Friday night consisting of figuring out what to do, because there's nothing that we HAVE to do. Stopping at a few stores on my way home from work and calling to say I'll be a couple of hours late. And to let's just do our own thing for dinner. Obscene amounts of free time to write blog entries of this length.

And I know, I know - we decided we were ready for a change. The ultimate next step. It's been a fine status quo, but we didn't want to continue with it for the rest of our lives.

I know that the freedom I have now will be replaced with overwhelming responsibility, but also unimaginable love for someone who is still a stranger to me. Intellectually I know this, but I haven't lived it yet. So, it's still the unknown to me. And the unknown can be scary. Even though it was our conscious decision to pursue this unknown.

So, yeah yeah yeah, I'm still Nicky... but Nicky will soon be fundamentally changing.
Stay tuned, everyone.

Nicky and Nate
36 weeks
Or, T-minus 28 days. -ish.

Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit

Growing up, our family practiced the superstition of saying "Rabbit Rabbit Rabbit" on the first day of a new month before we said anything else that morning. It was supposed to ensure that we'd have good luck that month. Forgot to do it that month? You were screwed.

Midnight of New Year's Eve 2000 was quite the test - we had to say Rabbit 15 times - 3 each for the month, the year, the decade, the century AND the millennium. Okay, maybe we didn't HAVE to, but we felt it would be a good insurance policy to do so, to help cover any forgotten months for the rest of our lives.

Well, even though I said my 15 Rabbits at 12:00:00 am on 01/01/00, clearly guaranteeing me a charmed remainder of life, I said three more this morning anyway.

And then I realized: when people ask when I'm due, my response is now "Next month."

What happened to "November" sounding so far away?

Nicky and Nate
34 weeks 5 days

Nicky's Neurosis Update

I swear that baby stuff is multiplying in our house.

It's coming in spurts:
items on loan or for keeps,
early "I just couldn't help myself" outfits,
and honest-to-goodness baby furniture.

I am too overwhelmed by the generosity and thoughtfulness demonstrated by friends and family thus far to list everything separately. But please know we are ever-appreciative.

People ask, "Are you all ready for the baby??"

Hmm... "ready" is a strong word.

It's more like, "We're getting there."

My mantra for this season is, "The in-box is never empty. The in-box is never empty."

Combining my personality with the nesting instinct inherent in late pregnancy makes for a dangerous mix.

Does it mean that I'm becoming super-productive and efficient? Let me just put it to you this way: you should see our coffee maker right now. Actually, you shouldn't. It would blind you from its newly cleaned sparkling whiteness that we haven't seen since we took our new purchase out of the box. In our college days. Good thing I crossed that very important to-do off the OTP list.

More like, I cleaned the coffee maker, then wrote it on the list, then crossed it off the list.
Like you haven't done that before. You know who you are.

Anyway - see what I mean??

Running into a woman while shopping yesterday who had a TINY baby in tow, delivered 6 weeks early, was the last thing I needed.

But hey, we gain an hour on November 4th... so I've got that going for me. Which is nice. I'm sure I'll be able to put that to good use. That should give me time to do something really important like detail the stove if it's pre-delivery, or actually sleep if it's post-delivery.

And I have to take back what I said about being knot-in-stomach free when thinking about the delivery. I thought I had talked myself out of that one, but I guess it's something I'm still working on. Classes on that start next weekend. Ending November 4th. Plenty of time, right??

Until next time...
dehydrated cherry tomatoes, anyone?

- Nicky and Nate
T minus 6 weeks
Oh WOW

Maternity Fashion Show

Did I mention that I love overalls?

Well, I love overalls.

Maternity overalls, that is.

I learned the hard lesson a couple of weeks ago that I don't fit into the ultra-cool pair of overalls that I, for some reason, kept from my college days of flannel shirts and baggy jeans.
There was simply not enough belly room in my "regular" overalls. Maternity overalls are where it's at. I'd like to take this opportunity to give another shout out to Nate's cousins Kate and Jen, and my friend Sara, who have contributed significantly to my maternity clothes wardrobe. Yes, I've supplemented with some of my own purchases, but at least this way I have a bit of variety so as to not wake up every morning feeling limited to a Maternity Uniform that consists of mixing and matching 4 "classic" pieces that are supposed to get me through these final 2 months.

Now, back to my love for overalls:
Maybe between now and November, overalls
will come back in style for the general population so that I can keep wearing such unrestrictive fashions as the ones I am featured in here. The idea of returning to life with fixed circumference waistbands and belts sounds so... rigid. Oh well... at least Tot won't judge me for my lack of fashion sense - at least for a few years until they start developing those precious child qualities: being honest and verbal. Can't wait for that killer combo.

By the way, Maine Fare was very cool indeed. I've included a few good links to give you a flavor, if you will, of the event.
www.kitchengardeners.org
www.leslieland.com
www.mofga.org

My favorite speaker, Sandy Oliver, doesn't have a website of her own, but her take-home message was very well timed for me, as one of the items on my in-an-ideal-world-To-Do-before-I-become-a-parent-List is to "become a better home cook so I can feed my child nutritious food that they will be willing to eat". You might not guess this about me, but I'm kind of a need-a-recipe kind of girl (bet you didn't see that one coming). But Sandy's message was to let go of the idea of recipes and just try stuff out. If it doesn't work, change it next time. But don't stress out about putting food together for dinner. Just have fun!

Amen - how freeing.

I just hope Nate's as excited as I am about my new sense of adventure in the kitchen.

Come on now, I meant adventurous COOKING.

Nicky and Nate
32 weeks 5 days
I just lost count the numbers are so high.

Mommy and Daddy get out of Dodge

In looking at our calendar in the Biggest Countdown of Our Lives, we determined that if we were going to take one last kid-free or childcare-arranged-free excursion, this was the weekend to do it. You could call this an observance of our 5-year wedding anniversary, or you could call it our Babymoon, but in any case we've put the necessary planning elements together that will allow us to fill up the cat bowls with extra food and water and spend a weekend elsewhere.

The search for where to go centered mostly on what we'd want to do, or rather, be able to do. You know, given my condition and all.

I have felt supremely lazy, which rules out hikes. Sorry, Mt. Katahdin. Maybe... some other time. And, it's tough to plan something that depends on being outdoors anyway due to our not-always cooperative Maine weather. I did look into pregnancy massages, which I think I'll treat myself to sometime before D-Day, but not this weekend, since that only involves one of us.
So, what could we do, what could we do, I wondered as I searched the internet...
I determined I wanted a change of scenery, but didn't want to "over schedule" us, and pay for two nights away (as we've recently been doing budget projections for a minor life change coming up). I could stroll around somewhere, but would want sitting breaks, in case I was having a Bad Hip Day. Eating good food was, of course, a requirement. Exploring somewhere that we haven't been before would be nice. So that brought me to looking into coastal Maine towns... and can I just tell you how much I love the internet. Guess what appeared as I searched "things to do in Camden Maine"... this weekend only:

"Join us for the weekend in beautiful Camden for a food festival that has something for everyone."

It's the Maine Fare festival, and Mommy and Daddy have tickets to experience all that fresh Maine food has to offer. And stroll around Camden, and take sitting breaks. I know, I know, it's no Prairie Home Companion trip... sigh... (hey I see those eyes rolling - the nerdiness is overwhelming, isn't it?) but this was right up our alley for what we were able to do this weekend. Given my, you know, condition.

And if Nate were to write this blog entry, it would go something like this:

"The Old Lady and I are going to this thing this weekend. She can't do much these days, so I figured I'd roll her around the streets of Camden and take eating breaks. Yadda yadda yadda, the best part is we're going to 'Beer, Breads and Sausages' Saturday night and I get to have all of her beer and she drives to the hotel."

And speaking of food...
That's a whole lot of mac'n'cheese in there.

Au Revior,
Nicky and Nate
32 weeks 3 days

Poor kid...

I'm afraid I've already figured out one of Daddy's traits that Tot may be cursed with... never-ending, body-spasming hiccups.

The not-heard-anywhere-else-in-nature sound and volume that these hiccups create are actually the most distinctive features of the Daddy Sylvester Hiccups (DSH). But the duration and rate of recurrence are also defining aspects of the DSH that, I fear, have become inherited by Tot.

I was already awake this morning and enjoying the lazing around in bed on a Sunday morning until I was truly ready to begin my day, which I know I should try to appreciate while I can. I was feeling Tot's usual kicks and maneuvers that I feel when I'm laying down. Then I noticed that it seemed this one type of kick was quite rhythmic, and I didn't know why Tot would move an arm or leg that many times in a row, about 2 times per second, and continue to.... hey wait a minute, I realized... maybe that's not an arm or leg at all, but rather Tot's diaphragm jumping to a steady beat of... Noooooooooo... DSH!!! I rubbed my belly. I rolled to the other side. I tapped. To no avail. They continued for almost 15 minutes. I imagined that Tot felt pretty, well, bushed, from all that hiccuping. Poor kid.

I'm interested to see if they sound like Daddy's once he or she isn't cooped up in a bag of amniotic fluid and really able to use those lungs. At least we won't have to worry about Tot getting the worst kind of hiccups for a good many years... the AAFBSH: After-a-Few-Beers-Sylvester-Hiccups.

On another note, I thought I'd update my reading list to accurately reflect all the books I am currently reading sections of based on my mood and whatever sub-topic of pregnancy feels most pressing at the time. The main topic lately is Labor and Delivery. I feel like I'm cramming for the biggest test of my life. Although, unlike in high school or college, when I always knew WHEN the test was going to be, I am only able to narrow this one down to a time span of a few weeks... could be in October, could be almost Thanksgiving for all I know.

I am happy to report that I am now able to think and read about the topic without a huge knot in my stomach. I even continue to breathe somewhat normally. The lightheadedness has also subsided considerably.

Thanks to my fabulous doula sister-in-law Kara (how lucky am I), the most helpful book so far has been Ina May Gaskin's Guide to Childbirth. And the website of Empowerisms (yes, "Empowerisms") was also just what I was needing to help wrap my mind around the fact that labor and delivery are, in fact, humanly possible.

So that's the labor preparation. And for full Team Tot participation, our full-day Prepared Childbirth class is next month.

But lately it's occured to me that maybe I should have a clue about what to do with Tot once he or she arrives. (Ahhh what a nice word - "arrives". Sounds like the baby will show up with a knock at the front door. Has anyone looked into that delivery method? Maybe there's still time for that to become an option. I can see it now - Nicky's Birthplan: Tot will knock on door. Nicky and Nate will answer door and pick Tot up. Tot will be fully clothed and diaper will have been recently changed. They will begin happy life together.)

Okay, enough Fantasy Land talk.

Anyway - I've heard from a few people that it is helpful to have done some research on the basics of taking care of a newborn before you have a live newborn to practice on. I'm sure that trial and error are an integral part of how one figures these things out, and every kid is different, blah blah blah... but I'd like to spare Tot, and us for that matter, any stress and tears that we can possibly spare by getting a basic clue before we become in charge or his or her well-being. Thus also registering for the "Breastfeeding Basics" and "Baby Care" classes.

I know, I know. At this point you are concerned for my blood pressure level due to the level of neuroticism I have just outlined. But, awareness is the first step, right? So, at least I'm able to identify where I'm at with all of this. And share it with all of you. Funny stuff, right??

And speaking of funny, I was reviewing pictures from our wedding, 5 years ago Friday. Wait a minute, that didn't come out right.

What was FUNNY was when I pictured Nate trying to re-create the one below with me in my present condition. I think the likelihood is quite high that another picture would follow it that shows a bride and groom emerging from the water having just created a good-sized splash.

Nicky and Nate
31 weeks 4 days

One more for the list

Nate didn't have to say so after last night's game, but I'm quite sure the name "Clay" just got added to the Red Sox players name list.

Hmmm...

Clay Sylvester
Buchholz Sylvester
Buch Sylvester
Holz Sylvester

Nicky and Nate
30 weeks 4 days
Holy September
The first of the "-ber" months

Name Talk

Although we are being difficult yet again by not sharing the names we decide on until Tot is born, I'll indulge you with a glimpse into our brainstorming process. Nate's in charge of presenting Team Tot with a panel of boy names to chose from. He's used the internet as a guide to get him started. But when he's feeling either really creative or really stumped (I'll let you be the judge), he looks for inspiration from, you're not going to believe this, non-traditional sources. Like Red Sox players while watching a game. Or road signs. Or inanimate objects.

And when I say brainstorm, I do mean brainstorm in the purest sense of the word. No editing. All ideas are verbalized. Free-association style. The following are some gems he's thrown out there. For consideration / entertainment.

For extra fun, just add "Sylvester" to any of these while reading down the list. Enjoy.

Big Poppy
Coco
Manny
Papelbon
Pedroia
Javier
Julio
Youkilis, or "Yuke"

A random one that he just can't get enough of:
Otis

While driving home from Dairy Queen this evening, he looked to road and business signs:
Konoco
Quirk
Nuzzo
Wadleigh
Bolley

As we pulled into our driveway, he looked internally. No, not within himself, but rather, the car.
That gave him:
AC
and finally my favorite,
Airbag

Nicky and Nate
30 weeks 2 days

Waaaaaaaa

That's the sound of me crying you a river.

I grunt a lot these days.
Bending over, turning over, reaching over.

I had always prided myself on my special talent of picking stuff up with my toes, but I've really been honing my skills lately with the added motivation of avoiding the bend-over. These toes can fetch socks, pencils, hiking boots, you name it. Okay, okay, I'm working on the hiking boots.

Thanks to, I guess, ligaments stretching, my right hip hurts. So depending on the degree of hip pain, I've got a very sexy limp.

I was feeling really good about remembering my vitamins about two-thirds of the days of the week, but my recent blood test revealed that my iron is low. Hmmmm... could that be adding to why Nicky feels like doing nothing but eating ice cream and sitting at the end of a work day? Or even in the beginning of it? And the record of all records: she took not one, but TWO naps this Saturday?

This could also be part of why I haven't gotten around to putting the brain cells together to muster up a blog entry.

But I was thinking about our original purpose for having this blog, and although it has served as a fun outlet for Nicky's creative writing energy, we really started it to help keep interested family and friends up-to-date on the need-to-know information about our pregnancy. Especially when we had so many significant family members living far away - it was important to us that everyone gets the same information at the same time. And we are aware that even though some folks live close by, we still don't see them as often as we'd like.

As I've been growing more physically uncomfortable, I've had writers block on how to share it. One never wants to be a complainer, but to omit these very real aspects of having such a huge change to the body is lacking authenticity. And my English teachers always said to "write what you know."

Emotionally, this pregnancy is also getting "bigger" - so big that I haven't known where to start to express all of the thoughts, fears, dreams, and musings enough to do it justice. Thus the lack of blog entries. The perfectionist in me is to blame.

So, while you may have enjoyed the tone of entries to date, I'm writing with a heads up that in order for me to write more frequent entries, I'm giving myself permission for them to not necessarily all come from the same writing formula.

And with that, I am pooped, or "bushed" as my dad says. As I write that, I realize that I don't think I've heard anyone else use that term in that way. Maybe they're out there, I just can't recall ever hearing it outside our family.

Oh and by the way,
we're THIRTY WEEKS tomorrow....
or "three quarters of the way through this thing"

Stay tuned for future posts on things I love:
Elastic waists
Overalls
Sleep

-Nicky and Nate

Big and only getting bigger

Finally took the time to take a belly pic... hope you enjoy.

Notes of late:
Nate's on his 6th annual Man Week vacation with the guys,
we had a Multi-Family garage sale this weekend,
and I harvested the first batch of tomatoes and peppers from the garden this weekend.
I also watched a birthing video earlier - we'll see what kind of dreams I have tonight...

I know, I know... this is all I have for an entry after such a drought...
but I'm going to try this crazy thing I've heard about called "Going to Bed Early Because I'm Tired."
Hey, I've got to do it while I can, right?

Nicky and Nate
28 weeks 5 days
Holy Mama